un,title,d
i came home ~ again/…after ending my whim of outing sans no sanity. and i started my pc to login to my blog to write something which i didn't want to be a part of reminisces/...since time is playing always against my wind to thwart me. so, am i cursed? ...don’t know. today… incidentally, i saw tony a girl with whom i was engaged once…’7’years ago. …nothing serious/…while i still think it was an infatuation. but, i don't know why i made me hide there to her……maybe i’ll not be the same in front of shakhi. .what.so.ever. i heard she (tony) get married recently/…plus she is about to give a birth (hi… rhythm, sakib, tanim... it's a good news buddy!). what elSe i should write here to infer...hoot…i didn't learn anything from that relationship…even i don't know whether we are in end of relationship or NOT??? ha-ha…
N.O.L.O.V.E
yes, 'baby', i was lost too. and it was invincible or whatever she said that inevitable. but, i didn't know why? may be i was so grim-fated... she said it, FAIR... fair enough.
With the reference to Elphaba... //Who should be sorry there? i'm sorry (since for unauthorized access!). ok... were you tending to criticize Glinda? Or what if Glinda having delusions of grandeur...? listen, i was a soldier not part of any war... though i loved Asgard.
anyway, someone somewhere is changing radically… What can you do? nothing. it’s limbo. once again... so say it 19 times: Maybe life is nothing And perhaps death is everything (it could be)
bappy... you_are_left_in_oblivion.
it's been a year... 2 years... or 3 years... ///-19june- it's not like other days (as it shouldn't be). i dearth words to express internalization. beside that, my mind starts to deal with acrid thoughts. i don't want to break anything and i deserve all those memories last forever inside my brain>>>today is (was) the birthday of my pal. i needn't to mail or send a digitized wish even no hi to him. since he's not anymore to accepts all these once he enjoyed with. i know i can't be reciprocated... i miss>>>you are>>> gone.
error
i don't know... why it is not working properly...
__________couldn‘t finish it. s’o’rry. ---*part_(1)
winning is everything... is winning everything? may be... may be the thought is established just because of chronological successes. or some way crush for wanted coincidences. miss-match… how can i prove these words wanted coincidences? i never can. here in this matter i never wish to be so called dogmatic. lets think and be little judgmental. ok, winning isn’t everything.
these days… often my brain lets my mind enough time to think… to rethink. before start the real story i should be apologetic for my offensive words as usual. and i‘m not here to hurt your moral beliefs anyway.
on 10april at 10:00am… i was in dhaka medical for some family purpose. i saw there the man again. he was bargaining with another man (may be a 3rd class stuff… a plumber… as he was with some iron pipes). i wanted to eavesdrop their conversations and i found the man was demanding 200 bucks for his blood from the plumber (that’s nothing new… you people must read or listen somewhere sometime that poor people sell their blood for money, in bangladesh). but the plumber gave him a new note of 100 taka. he giggled and moved slowly saying that, ‘i’ll come again after 3 months’. he has changed his vehicle and the moving partner as well. previously he owned a 4 wheeled vehicle. i saw this man in farmgate over-bridge more than 4 years ago. actually he was living there inside. every time i passed him i was used to give him little changes. i can remember… once i talked to him with my friend shuvo and gave him 50 taka (i usually never bother with beggar… and however, even i don’t like to help anybody with the ability to stand by legs). handicap people suck my mercy… that cares… i rather like to revile the most powerful being, the god, and that’s over easy you know. he is a perfect idiot and i‘m perfect weird? ok, let’s back to the man. the man is sans any legs. he is also a blind. furthermore, he is having deep septic wound inside and pops over the whole body which covered him extremely dirty. i was gazing the man from back. at 10:30am i was driving alone toward my home. for a third time i saw the man taking sugarcane juice at footpath binge. i stopped my car and went there to drink (i loved that juice!!!). i asked him whether he could recognize me or not. he couldn’t. this time i treated him a glass of juice. meanwhile i tended a keen look over him and found he is not less than 65 years now. i couldn’t hold myself to ask him a question. i asked him what reason he is leaving for and is he comprising any respect for god (i‘m a dim–witted i know… my friend rhythm is also facing this sort of questions from me). he answered me that god is everything in his life but after his death he must ask god, ‘what was the reason for his suffering in the factual life’. i‘m almost disappointed. how gracious he is. though i was not expected any opposite answer. other than what is the significance for that suffering? what god is trying to learn us? silly… i know and may be almost childish. but what else… or may be there are some valid reasons which are necessary as a part of our growing up. my contradiction is getting loose day by day.
yadda yadda yadda… we (or won or are winning) win because we are not handicapped yet. even if
note: i’ll finish this article soon… it’ll be named as *part_(2)
version 3
finally, i've prepared the new layout for my personal website... here it is:
